Second thoughts keep us away from fulfilling our potential.
Is this distressing reluctance a safe choice indeed?
What is it that keeps us away from change and therefore prevents us from living the life we want to live? Ultimately, what’s the thing that holds us back from our dreams?
What kind of life do we want to live? What are our dreams and where do we want to be in six months?
In order to achieve our dreams, we need to become different people. Here’s what I mean by that. The dream is somewhere ahead of us, and here, standing still, is who we are today. In order to get closer to the dream, we need to move toward it. Think of the dream as a villa, like a new house. Would you ever take old bricks from an abandoned house to build the new one?
No, you would not.
Therefore, we build using new bricks. This means we develop new skills, assimilate new knowledge, find new inspirations, and make new mistakes. Building on new experiences is of the utmost importance, but doing that requires a lot of work. Way too much work. Work means doing things in a different way.
It means stepping outside your comfort zone.
Most of us want to see the results. We say “I want to achieve this” and then give up, not even thinking about the steps required. We don’t realize how much we have to work in order to achieve what we want.
What are the chances you might wake up one morning and decide to run a marathon on a whim? You wouldn’t do it, right? Because you have to train for it first. So why do you want to be with the perfect man or woman when you haven’t worked on yourself first—when you are not “perfect” either? Why do you want a higher salary when you have not become a better employee? You have not attended a seminar, gone through training, or acquired new knowledge.
What’s holding you back from becoming a better person?
The thing holding us back is our dear E-G-O.
Ego is the voice inside of all of us, the child that doesn’t want us to step outside our comfort zone, because it’s too afraid of change. It’s okay to be afraid of change.
There’s this void in life: You don’t know what it’s going to be like, you don’t know how to do it, and it’s a big decision. You can’t know the outcome. For example, if you decide to move, to leave your country, and you can’t find a job. Or if you get into a new relationship, or have a child, or invest a large amount of money in your studies. Therefore, in this void, in this journey full of uncertainty, the Ego is screaming: “Why do you want to move to a new house? Are you insane? You’re fine here!” “How can you be with this guy? He has no money. He has a kid! You won’t be able to go out whenever you want.” “All that money for a certification? Why would you do that?” The Ego is screaming, and it’s saying Stay away from change.
If you don’t take action, and you keep listening to your Ego, the universe will take action for you. The ultimate goal is to keep becoming a better person. Our goal in life is to grow more and more each day. We are put on this Earth to pass tests and to see the ways in which we can develop our higher self. Therefore, if you sit back and “chill”, the universe is going to end up kicking your butt, and taking you way out of your comfort zone.
If you don’t fall into this void by yourself, the universe will come up from behind and kick you into it.
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Jill Douka MBA, PCC